On my mind: Marriage. On April 20, I married Matt in our living room in front of our closest family. We’ve been together for four and a half years, living together for almost two. As such, I felt like our relationship was pretty well established. I did not expect to feel significantly different after the wedding. But I do.
There is a new closeness between us, and a new vulnerability; it is, after all, a vulnerable thing to pledge the rest of your life to someone. One could argue that from a legal and financial standpoint, buying a house together was a far riskier step than getting married. But I feel the emotional risk more acutely — the risk of being betrayed, heartbroken, deeply wounded — while also feeling a sense of complete trust in and safety with Matt. It feels that we are both aware of this, and have been holding each other more gently and compassionately as a result. I think we are both a little bit in awe of the commitment we have made to one another. It seems so quotidian — marriage is commonplace, we are surrounded by married people — but also, to us, almost mystical. I hope we’re able to maintain contact with this feeling as the months and years pass.
What I’ve been up to: Getting married! We wanted to keep it simple by having it at home, but we (okay, I) ended up making it a little more complicated. Since this newsletter is in large part about things I like, I’m going to take this opportunity to give a shoutout to the awesome vendors we used:
Aubry Million at Grow Salon: Aubry’s been doing my hair for several years now and she is just the best. I didn’t even bother with a hair trial because I knew she would rock it, and she totally did.
Sweets by Millie: Our cake was beautiful and SO GOOD. We chose almond cake with raspberry jam and vanilla buttercream and it was perfect.
Chef Casey with Chef It Up: Chef Casey cooked an incredible dinner for us and our guests in our very own kitchen. We told him we wanted surf and turf because it’s one of our favorite special occasion meals, and he took that and ran with it. The menu:
Hors d'oeuvres:
Mini Italian meatballs with marinara and parmesan cheese
Mushroom tarts with bacon and Saint Andre cheese
Roasted tomato bruschetta with red onion, roasted garlic, and feta on crostini with balsamic glaze and lemon and garlic aioli
Appetizer:
Cast iron seared crab cake, chimichurri remoulade, roasted red pepper coulis, toasted herb bread crumbs, parsley oil, micro arugula
Entree:
Cast iron seared filet mignon and butter poached Lobster tail, charred scallion compound butter, potato pave, grilled haricot vert, crispy fried shallots, roasted garlic demi-glace, basil oil
Nathan Cornetet with Fusion Photography: Matt knew Nathan from college, but I was a little wary of using him, because “I know someone who’s a photographer” does not always translate into good photos. But Nathan is the real deal. He’s also a really sweet and funny guy and did a great job of getting both romantic and fun poses, as well as wonderful candid shots.
Grace Huneck with Botanica Design Studio: Y’all. I spent a fortune on flowers for this tiny little wedding and it was WORTH EVERY PENNY. When I started looking for florists I absolutely fell in love with Grace’s designs and I was so thrilled that she was available to work with us. She delivered the flowers while I was out doing hair and makeup and when I came home and saw them I was awestruck.
You may notice that I am not giving a shoutout to my makeup artist. I’m not going to put her on Front Street here, but my eye makeup was lopsided and my fake lashes were so droopy that I look like my eyes are closed in a lot of the photos. I did not realize how bad it was until I got home and it was too late to do anything about it. But Matt still cried when he saw me because I was so beautiful, so whatever.
Honeymooning: We spent a week in Costa Rica for our honeymoon. We stayed at the Royal Corin Thermal Water & Spa Resort, which was lovely. We saw a lot of beautiful plants, animals, mountains/volcanoes, and waterfalls. We went ziplining for the first time. The people there were very friendly and kind. It’s an A+ destination for nature lovers.
As is often the case when I travel, I have returned home with a cold, so I’m spending the day in bed with my dog and a box of tissues. I’m looking forward to recovering and finally settling into married life. It’s mostly the same as unmarried life, but a little bit sweeter.